It has been a while since I last did a Life Update, so I thought I’d do another one.
I’ll be honest, I feel that lately, I’ve lost my motivation for life, my enthusiasm for the everyday and the world seems to have lost its shine. I think I’d be quite happy to hibernate for a while, catch up on sleep and take a bit of a break. It feels like life is passing me by and I’m missing out on things by not really feeling it at the moment. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still massively appreciative about what we have and the people we have around us, but sometimes life does get a bit too full on.
In my last Life Update, I wrote about work and how busy it was and how pressured I felt about it. All in all, this hasn’t particularly changed although I have got better at prioritising what needs to be done and what can wait for another day. There’s always something to do, but it is about creating that balance. The more hectic works gets, as it does at this time of year, the more I long to be my own boss and create my own schedule. I love my job but it ain’t half stressful at times.
I also know that I don’t help myself. I am so over-critical of myself at the moment that it’s beginning to get me down slightly. My anxiety is rising which in turn means I’m not sleeping as well as I should, and it comes to putting too much pressure on myself. Does anyone else do this? I know that, probably, looking from the outside in to our lives, we’re doing pretty well. We don’t have any debt, we live in a nice house, we get the luxury of travel and we have each other. I know, deep down, that we’re doing alright. But it always feels like I should be doing more; I should be earning more, helping others more, being better at my job, just being better in general. This is another reason why I need a break; I need a break from the cycle of work-home-repeat and get a chance to relax.
Me and my husband have a couple of nights away booked for next week and it cannot come at a better time. We’re staying at a lovely hotel where the food is divine, the grounds are big enough for us to have a wander around and there’ll be big log fires to sit beside and read a book. I cannot wait; we’ve booked an afternoon tea as well for the first day we’re there as an additional extra, just to make our time away even more special than it will already be. Although we don’t know which room will be ours, I do know that it’ll have a beautiful view from the window, with a gorgeous bedroom for us to relax in. I may even indulge in a bubble bath whilst we’re there – well why not?
I think, to get me out of the rut I feel that I’m in, I need to do an update of my lists. I’m a list-maker by nature and I think that clearing my head and getting things written down will help me. I also need to look at what needs doing now and what can wait until another day/month.
I just need to stay optimistic, as this too shall pass.
Does anyone else feel like this at the moment? What are you doing to combat the “blues”?